I seriously cannot believe that five days of classes have gone by. I think my new saying for postbac will be, "if you want a year to go by as quickly as possible, become a postbac".
This last week, I started two classes. I'm taking General Chemistry (with a lab) and General Biology (with a lab). Both classes I was very interested to take, but I knew that Chem would probably be the more burdensome of the two in terms of workload, and I was so right. I spent almost every hour of my waking time this last week doing Chemistry. Chemistry practice problems, Chemistry flashcards, Chemistry equations, Chemistry reading, Chemistry homework, and the list goes on.
I seriously feel guilty for my Biology work - I have not given it as much attention, because for me, it is so much more intuitive. Like, hey, this is a cell. This is how stuff works in there. It all clicks.
The good news about the pace is that both classes last for only 6 weeks, so now, I'm already 1/6 finished with these classes (which sounds like insanity to say out loud). The bad news is that the pace is absolutely grueling. I took two tests on Friday, both of which were on about two chapters worth of information. If you know anything about Chemistry, you know that's nearing firehose proportions of information to retain.
I could go on about how hard I've been working, but I won't. The truth is that while this week was really hard and a jarring transition, I've been really happy to be in the middle of it. Doing this work is directly correlated to a purpose, to a goal, that isn't distant, but is within one years' reach. I think this is a huge bonus of postbac. You are working A LOT, but the motivation is there because you know that it will be over soon (relatively speaking), and that it leads somewhere you really want to go (otherwise, why would you make sacrifices in the first place to do postbac?).
I've done a lot of reflecting about my academic experience now versus as an undergrad and the difference is night and day. In undergrad, there were many classes that were required, but my heart just wasn't there. I showed up and was there in body, but the mind part, not so much. In my classes now, I'm there and fully engaged in class. I write notes like a madwoman and do as many problems as I can. I am so incredibly concerned with not only making good grades, but retaining the information, because in just about a year I'll take the MCAT (required entrance test to get into Medical School), and it is NO JOKE. So retention will be important.
My classes are interesting. Last week I learned about atoms and moles (not the animals), and cells, and nuclear decay reactions and did experiments on freshwater plants and my cheek cells and potatoes and on pond water (yes, pond water - summary of that experience, you wouldn't want to live in there). And it's all clicking.
I went into my advisor's office on Friday to talk with her because I was feeling seriously overwhelmed. How was I supposed to remember all of this information? Am I really cut out for this? She was so nice and told me that most students get panicky during their first week because it's hard and it's new and your mind isn't used to thinking in this way after you've been out of school for awhile. She was right. I walked out of my Chemistry test on Friday and actually felt a level of mastery. I understood the test (or so I thought - we'll see when my grade comes back). I had some confidence.
So, if you're a postbac (or anyone, really) who is drowning in the newness and scariness and frustrating-ness (not a word) of it all, just be reminded that you can do it. Scariness does not equal impossibility. Sometimes, just the opposite.
This last week, I started two classes. I'm taking General Chemistry (with a lab) and General Biology (with a lab). Both classes I was very interested to take, but I knew that Chem would probably be the more burdensome of the two in terms of workload, and I was so right. I spent almost every hour of my waking time this last week doing Chemistry. Chemistry practice problems, Chemistry flashcards, Chemistry equations, Chemistry reading, Chemistry homework, and the list goes on.
I seriously feel guilty for my Biology work - I have not given it as much attention, because for me, it is so much more intuitive. Like, hey, this is a cell. This is how stuff works in there. It all clicks.
The good news about the pace is that both classes last for only 6 weeks, so now, I'm already 1/6 finished with these classes (which sounds like insanity to say out loud). The bad news is that the pace is absolutely grueling. I took two tests on Friday, both of which were on about two chapters worth of information. If you know anything about Chemistry, you know that's nearing firehose proportions of information to retain.
I could go on about how hard I've been working, but I won't. The truth is that while this week was really hard and a jarring transition, I've been really happy to be in the middle of it. Doing this work is directly correlated to a purpose, to a goal, that isn't distant, but is within one years' reach. I think this is a huge bonus of postbac. You are working A LOT, but the motivation is there because you know that it will be over soon (relatively speaking), and that it leads somewhere you really want to go (otherwise, why would you make sacrifices in the first place to do postbac?).
I've done a lot of reflecting about my academic experience now versus as an undergrad and the difference is night and day. In undergrad, there were many classes that were required, but my heart just wasn't there. I showed up and was there in body, but the mind part, not so much. In my classes now, I'm there and fully engaged in class. I write notes like a madwoman and do as many problems as I can. I am so incredibly concerned with not only making good grades, but retaining the information, because in just about a year I'll take the MCAT (required entrance test to get into Medical School), and it is NO JOKE. So retention will be important.
My classes are interesting. Last week I learned about atoms and moles (not the animals), and cells, and nuclear decay reactions and did experiments on freshwater plants and my cheek cells and potatoes and on pond water (yes, pond water - summary of that experience, you wouldn't want to live in there). And it's all clicking.
I went into my advisor's office on Friday to talk with her because I was feeling seriously overwhelmed. How was I supposed to remember all of this information? Am I really cut out for this? She was so nice and told me that most students get panicky during their first week because it's hard and it's new and your mind isn't used to thinking in this way after you've been out of school for awhile. She was right. I walked out of my Chemistry test on Friday and actually felt a level of mastery. I understood the test (or so I thought - we'll see when my grade comes back). I had some confidence.
So, if you're a postbac (or anyone, really) who is drowning in the newness and scariness and frustrating-ness (not a word) of it all, just be reminded that you can do it. Scariness does not equal impossibility. Sometimes, just the opposite.
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